Pages From My Diary.....

"A word of caution before you read : The following notes are random thoughts and key milestones which I used to note in my journal/laptop and may not follow chronological order. They are uploaded here in a single post and not separated under different topics. Sorry for that..."

Saturday, November 25th
Today, we went to the doc with the baby for general check up and also because Anna was having puffy eyes since a few days. Heart of heart, I was more interested to ask the doc about feeding solids to the baby.

Saturday, hence there was a fairly big crowd at the doc’s. All kids were older than mine and I was pretty envious of them. My baby weighed 6.89 kg and that’s a good growth as per doc. Was glad. Doc said we can feed her Cerelac rice and mousambi juice and then to introduce new item like apple juice etc. every week after a month or so.

Very excited, I bought my first Cerelac at Apollo pharma on the ground floor of the hospital. Bought a small ‘katori’ and spoon. At 8 p.m – the stage was set with baby on the bouncer and Maya and self with the first cerelac ready to be tried on Anna. She had about 3 spoons or so. Was happy that she did not reject.

Sunday, December 10th
For the first time I dreamt about Anna last nite. I felt very bad in the morning as the dream was not a good one. Saw that she had hurt herself in the eye. I don’t want to recall this hence no more details.

Increased the dose of Cerelac from one spoon to 1.5 spoon from today.

With the baby now, several thoughts and concerns cross my mind. Will I be a good mom ? I am so dedicated to work, will I ever neglect her ? In the past, before Anna – work was on top of my priorities. Will that change later ? I seriously feel like being stay at home mom – but I know its not practical as I want to give her the best – best clothes, books, toys and want to send her to the best school. I hope, I am right in taking this decision.
13th January, ‘07
Increased dosage to 5 spoons. She had 7 spoons for lunch today as she was asking for more. Started feeding water as per bhauju from today.

10th July 2007 - Anna's First Birthday !
Anna's account of how she spent the "Big Day"......
Today was my first birthday. It is a Tuesday. I woke up at around 7.30 am. Mama tells me that I had a long day ahead and she did not want me to be cranky through the day so she put me back to sleep again.

Finally, I woke up at 9 am and I had my breakfast – apple, puri and aloo dum. I did not finish my puri and alu but finished my quota of apple. After that, I got dressed in my new pink frock. This was bought by mama and kaka from globus yesterday. I, papa and mama went to the church (Jesus Calls) at around 10.30 am. It was the first time I went to the church. There, one auntie called Susan Madhu prayed for me. She told mama and papa that I will be a singer and God has given me a good voice.

After this we came back home and picked up Maya didi to go to the zoo. We reached the zoo at a place called Vandalur which was about one hour drive. But the sad part is, the zoo is closed on Tuesdays. We were very disappointed. But, Shiva uncle, our driver suggested that we can go to Mahabalipuram. So, we decided to go to MGM beach resort.

There, I saw the sea so close for the first time. I loved the water and the white waves. I kept pointing at the waves and did not want to leave the beach. I also walked on the sand. My feet on dry sands felt so good. I walked on wet sands too and my feet became all black! Papa took lots of snaps too.

We had our lunch in the restaurant. I had my orange juice and Cerelac. I sat on the big chair like a big girl and kept on babbling and playing with the spoon. I dropped the spoon number of times making a loud metallic sound which mama used to pick up with a warning every time.

Once we left the restaurant, Maya didi made me sit on various rides outside like see saw and merry-go-round in a stationery position. Initially I was scared, but later I enjoyed it and mama and Maya didi started rotating the same slowly while papa started clicking photographs feverishly.

We came back home and mama and papa started preparaing for the evening party. They made me cut a big cake and everyone sang “Happy Birthday To You”….Mama/Papa and the guests left home to eat dinner at a nearby restaurant (Cakewalk) while I stayed at home with Maya didi. I was too tired and went to sleep early at 10 p.m




7th October, 2007 - One Month of Motherhood

Maya (Maid) is to go home this Dasai (Puja) and the thought of how to manage the house during this period had been haunting me regularly.

I had to let her go as she could not go the last time when her train tickets did not get confirmed. I wanted to let her go for a good one month (she wanted that) and be free of the guilt.

As the day (8th October 2007 , Monday night at 10.40 pm) drew closer, I was nervous. I kept a newspaper ad clip that said “Home Services” for maids, cooks, drivers, patient care etc. Spoke to them but it was a futile exercise. Half of them talked only in Tamil and those who knew hindi – were far too expensive. Ashim suggested that we get the nurse (Dhanalaxmi) whom we had used during my delivery. I spoke to her but did not get the right vibes hence gave up. Then, I talked to Vijaya to check if she could come in the morning and stay the whole day with me. She agreed.
Day 1 – Monday (8th Oct)
Today, I am at home trying to get used to the fact that I will be on my own with the baby henceforth for a month. Vijaya came and did some odd jobs alongwith Maya. I managed the baby most of the time today and was fairly comfortable. Maya left in the night at 9.30pm for the station. She apparently was crying and feeling bad to leave the baby behind.

Baby ate well and slept well and di not wake up. She slept the entire night in the crib.
Day 6 – Saturday (13th Oct)
Today, somehow I was hoping to have a relaxed day with Ashim’s holiday. But he had to go to work. Anyways, by now I am quite well versed with the routine and kind of feeling proud to be able to manage it well. So far.

Day was good. Got up at 9.30 with the baby. She ate brown bread and omlette followed by orange juice. Then we went down for a walk. Came up and she ran around a bit and then it was bathtime. She ate her lunch okay (not polished up everything that is !) and was too drowsy. Went to sleep immediately at 2 p.m

Ashim came home by 5 pm so we went to Adyar poonga nearby and saw some pictures and nice paintings on stone slabs of the birds and animals

For Anna – everything that is round and red is an apple or balloon irrespective of the size. And, anything that is brown and round is an “aloo”. For example she pointed at the garden stones and pebbles in Adyar poong and yelled ‘aloooooo’.

We went to the Besantnagar beach after that. I wanted to know how her reactions to the beach/waves would be as this will be almost like the the first time we would be able to notice her reactions. The last time we went there, she was too small. I also wanted to show her the balloons today as she often talks about balloons now a days after she saw them in the book (Sam and Sally story). The moment we showed the balloons in the beach she got excited and wanted one badly. We did not give her one as they were not clean and was afraid that she will put it in her mouth.

She was very happy to see the waves and wanted to go into the water. We had a tough time trying to retain her in our arms. When on the ground, she would not like to hold our hands and was trying to run into the water. Scary. So, we left the beach and had a brief walk on the pavement.

From here, we went to Green Trends for her hair cut. Anna cried a bit but the guy was fast and pretty good (Vijay Kumar) and voila – Anna has a new haircut. She kept on playing with the toy after that while Ashim got his hair cut. Came home by 7 pm by which time Anna had slept in the car. She is still sleeping as I write this note in my laptop sitting next to the bed where she is sleeping.

What’s New ? - New words she learnt. Thanda (cold), kite. I felt she uttered two words phrase today for the first time when she said – Susu garyo pointing at the susu in the bed.

Day 7 – 14th Oct, 2007, Sunday
First weekend after Maya left, at home with Ashim. We started the day late as I and Anna woke up only around 10 am. Last night Anna got up and cried a lot and gave us a tough time. Hence, I was sleepy through he day.

Not a very good Sunday as I kept thinking, for the first time, that I am going through so much pain due to the baby though I relatively had a lighter day due to ashim being around. He cooked lunch and took care of the baby while I had my long bath.

She was a little cranky in the morning but was okay after her afternoon sleep. Could not give her a good variety to eat as Vijaya had not come in the day today.

What’s New ? - She had jam for the first time today (wholewheat bread and papaya & ginger jam from 24 mantra). I think she liked it.

I taught her what is a towel by demonstrating it and she picked it up fast and pronounced it very clearly and correctly.
She also learnt to say “na na” when she wanted to convey ‘no’. Hence, when I offered her a spoonful of rice, she said ‘na na’ and did not eat after that. While putting her to sleep – I asked ‘kida lai bolaun ?’ (should I call the insect?) …’Na na’ was her answer.

Day 8 – 15th Oct 2007, Monday

Today, I was having a bad backache when I woke up in the morning. Partly because I was sleeping towards the AC and was a little cold. Hence, decided to have a non-activity day – No going out in the evening with Anna and no making her walk and chasing….

She was very calm and happy today. May be because all of us spent good time with her yesterday. She did not eat well though (nibbled at the dosa in breakfast, had only bhindi and little rice for lunch, and completely rejected puri and aloo in the evening snacks. Did not even eat her banana…For dinner she had beetroot and rice with curd). Everyday saving grace is the fact that she eats one apple, an egg and curd.

I felt that she suddenly grew overnight today. She started talking much more and found her very expressive.

What’s New ! - I was shocked when she pointed at one of the pictures in her book (baby and ablue towel) and said “towel”. I had taught her this word only yesterday and surprised that she noticed, recognized and remembered the word.

Today I felt that I should make a list of all the words she knows. So here it goes.

Mama
Papa
Kaka
Mana (Maya)
Kau Kau (crow)
Ban (Banjo)
Apple
Pa(Pani)
Teddy
Booki (Books)
Winnie (Pooh-stuff toy)
Chappal
Pocket
Pant (panty)
Chalo chalo
Aunty
Baby
TV
Gana (Music)
Eyes
Nose
Tummy
Petu (tummy)
Kan (Ears)
Khutta (feet)
Banda (close)
Towel
Dudu (Milk)
Pala (go away, throw away..)

Day 11 – 18th October, Thu

Today I woke up in the morning cribbing to ashim saying he does not contribute in anna’s work and not concerned about my job etc. etc. After sometime, he said he will take leave today. I was more than thrilled.

Day was lighter for me with ashim around.

Shiva’s mom and Brinda came to see Anna in the evening. Anna had her full bowl of oats in the evening and I was so happy and proud of the same.

In the evening we went to spencer plaza to buy ashim’s clothes. Went to Pantaloon and Westside. Anna was very chirpy in the car. On return, she slept in the car.

What’s New ! Ashim taught her a new word – tongue. If you ask her where is the tongue ? she will put her finger there….

Day 12 – 19th October, Friday

Today both of us woke up at 12 noon. This could be partly because she woke up at 6.30 am had her milk and then fell off to sleep after some persuasion. I was too sleepy in the morning and barely could get up. Ashim made the milk, I fed and I left her to sleep.

Today she ate better (Vijaya had made sweet pongal) and also pottied better. Also slept in the afternoon between 4-5 pm. We generally spent time indoors as I did not want her to sweat too much needing bath since she is having a slight running nose.

Today in the morning she clamped her two fingers in the bedroom door. This was something I always feared and it happened. I felt like crying after seeing slight blood. Surprisingly she did not cry too much. Thank God.

What’s New ? Today I felt that time is flying. Didn’t realize its already Friday. That’s a good sign I thought. Days are not dragging.


Tuesday – 22nd October 2007
Today I had told ashim to send the car back after reaching his office as I wanted to go out.

I and Anna went to my office in the morning around 11.30am. Met everyone. She was timid initially but slowly opened up, more with Rathna. She wore her maroon corduroy dress (Liliput) and I felt she was not looking fresh (since she had not had a bath).

Picked up my posts and gave my leave form to Paneer.

On the way back, picked up some grocery and essentials from Food world. Got Real Good chicken and started giving it to Anna and Banjo everyday.

Wednesday - 23rd October, 2007

Today again, I and Anna woke up around midday. Had our breakfast at 12.30 am. She ate her idli with milk and I loved the garam garam idli with chutney !
A little walking around and it was time for a bath. She ate lunch at 2 p.m with a lot of drama.

Anna started going to Vijaya now a days for short span at least. I could eat my lunch while Vijaya kept her for sometime. Anna slept late today in the afternoon (around 4.30pm) and surprisingly slept longer till 6.30pm. She woke up fresh and had her bowl of oats.

The day flew (since our day began at midday). In the night, she ate her dinner and slept by midnight.
What’s new ? started calling papa/bye bye papa (repeatedly) before going to sleep to prolong her sleeping time. Very smart.

5th February, 2008 (Tuesday)
Writing this after a long gap of two months.
Before I forget.
Anna is now one and a half year old and milestones she reached are :
- Can speak sentences now (Mama eta bachha)
- Can utter long babblings
Her fisrt video – on laptop – Rhymes. She watched with attention. She recollected some of them later by saying (dimple chin, hot bun, jota phatyo…etc.)


12th February, 2008 (Tue)
Anna is so amazing. I thank God for bringing her to our lives.
What she loves eating?
All fruits. Mostly – Strawberry (chopped with sugar sprinkled)
Curd
Bhindi
Paneer
broccoli

What she does not like to eat ?
Bread
Rotis

Her favourite toys
- Simon, Pooh (Soft toy)

May 21st to April 3rd – Trip to Baripada

This time, she was better off than the last time. She talked a lot, played and surprised everyone with her vocabs and mannerism. However feeding her was still a problem. She ate fruits and veggies but did not eat rice.

Journey back in train was also a tough one as she did not sleep well or enjoy the train ride. First time I had such a problem with her in the train. Potty was a easy task as she did it (near the toilet in her potty and washing in the loo).

She was down with cold and runny nose at the end of the trip and I had fever and cold too.

April 2008
She was diagnosed with ear infection by the doctor. However, she did not have to take antibiotics as it healed itself.

14th April, Monday 2008
I and Ashim went to Odyssey and got her a cycle (Fisher price). Used it in the terrace the same evening She seemed to like it but she is too small to pedal now. Had to push her.

3rd May, Saturday 2008
Holiday to Coorg. Ashim, Maya Anna and I left for Mysore by Mysore Express scheduled at 9.30 pm

Baby was excited and in a holiday mood. Train journey always gives me jitters as how Anna behaves is always unpredictable. This time she was fine and slept well (though she slept very late.). Couldn't write about this trip. Just posting some pictures for memory....

1. At the Hotel Lobby 2. Mama & Baby - Tired of posing for too long

3. Anna - touching an elephant at the Elephant Camp


4th May, Sunday
First day to school

18th July
Mothers were also allowed. She did not cry and behaved better than I expected.

It started with a prayer, followed by toys, snack time and then playtime outsde classroom. She loved the car (and even said bye mama, am going to office). She played blocks, xylophone. We sang “put your left hand in, left hand out…..”

August, 2008
Anna started sleeping on her own (without having to hold her) from sometime towards the end of October. Initially, I thought it was not going to last long…but it is going on for almost a week now and looks like this has become a routine.

2nd November 2008, Sunday
Anna, me and Ashim went to the Church today. I was excited since yesterday and planned well. Called the driver at 11 and it went off well.

Anna wore a new white cotton frock and she was attentive throughout the service. Pastor Chadwick spoke on traveling through a narrow road versus a broad road as Christians (e.g Christians who just hear and do no actions are still choosing the broad gate). Took Anna to the Pastor at the end of the Service and he prayed for her. Thank you Lord for my family and please take care of Anna to grow up to be a “God’s Child” and give me enough wisdom to bring her up in the RIGHT way.

November 2008
Anna started going to school without Diapers. By Nov end, she is almost toilet trained.

The New Year - 2009

Jan 2009
The year began on a bad note. Maya ditched and did not come back with us (5th Jan) . Had a bad time managing home and baby. Dad was around and was very supportive in terms of not demanding his usual stuff. I gave him tea at 10.30/11pm and he did not complain. I was so touched when he washed dishes couple of times in the afternoon.

Dad tried very hard to contact everyone for a maid for me. He saw all the pain and managed to get one maid – Kamala who was at Chennai within a month of this problem.
Things are getting back to normal.

13th Feb
This is the first day Anna got picked up by Kamala and stayed with her alone the whole afternoon. It was smooth.

14th Feb
Have been dying to write 2 things about Anna

Today when I was reading the “Opposites” to her and asking her – I said “Happy” (Noddy Book where the opposite of happy is a man with a sad face, hence the answer is ‘SAD’). She thought for a while and said – “Not Happy”! I kissed her.

Some months back when I was carrying my san naps and rushing to the loo – anna stopped me and said ‘mama’s huggies is so small’. Kids are amazing.